quotheraven's Diaryland Diary

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Michael's hearing things...

My son is hearing voices now. He says there's a bad guy in his brain that tells him to do bad things and says he tries to plug him up but he keeps finding his way out. He is only 6 years old, far too young to be going through things like this. He is obssessed with death, it's almost all he talks about. He is very down on himself, says he is nothing but a loser and he wants to just make himself bleed so he can die and be in the ground with his grandpa who died 2 years ago this month. He doesn't know how to kill himself...YET...but I know one day he will know so I have to get help for him now. He also speaks of seeing things that no one else sees. He said one night his closet door opened and out crawled tons of snakes and scorpions. He said they were loud and he didn't want to wake me or his step-dad so he opened his window and forced them all out. When I asked him if that was only a dream he has, he said "No mom, I'm serious!". I pray so hard that God will touch him and stop these delusions of his. Stop his pain. He is so young to be feeling so badly all the time. I love him so much. Being a mother certainly is hard at times like these. One night I awoke to him standing next to my bed, and I'm sad to say so, but I was terrified! No mother should be terrified of her own son. Anyway, I just wanted to vent. He has an in-take appointment on May 5th to have a complete psychological evaluation performed on him. I pray it works.

3:04 p.m. - 2003-04-07

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